Scared To Go To Therapy? How to overcome seven common reasons for anxiety
If you’re feeling scared about starting therapy, then you are not alone and there’s nothing wrong with you. In fact, that fear often means you’re taking something important seriously.
Therapy is not just another appointment. It asks for honesty, vulnerability, and the willingness to be seen. Of course the nervous system hesitates. For many people, fear is the doorway, not the problem.
Here are some of the most common reasons people feel scared to go to therapy, and why those fears make sense.
Seven Common Fears of Therapy
Fear of being judged or seen as “too much”
One of the most common worries is, What if I’m judged? What if your thoughts feel messy, contradictory, or intense? Many people carry a history of being misunderstood or criticized when they were vulnerable.
A good therapist is not there to evaluate or fix you. Therapy is meant to be a space where nothing has to be edited or defended. The fear of judgment usually points to past experiences, not present danger.
2. Fear of opening something that can’t be closed
People often worry that therapy will “stir things up.” What if emotions spill out and don’t stop? What if memories surface that feel overwhelming?
This fear is a form of self protection. Therapy, done well, does not flood you. It moves at the pace your system can tolerate. You are not required to relive everything or say anything before you’re ready.
3. Fear of losing control
Starting therapy can feel like handing the steering wheel to someone else. You may worry about being pushed, interpreted, or guided in ways that don’t feel right.
In reality, therapy works best when you remain in control of what you share and how fast you go. You are allowed to say no, to pause, and to ask questions. The work is collaborative, not directive.
4. Fear of discovering something scary or shameful
Some people fear what therapy might uncover: anger, grief, trauma, or parts of themselves they’ve tried hard not to see. There can be anxiety about finding out that something is deeply “wrong.”
Therapy doesn’t create these things. It simply offers a safer place to meet what is already there, often with more compassion than you’ve been able to offer yourself.
5. Fear of becoming dependent
Trying therapy requires hope, and hope can be risky. If you’ve tried to change before and felt disappointed, it’s understandable to be cautious.
This fear isn’t negativity. It’s often grief from past attempts that didn’t bring relief.
6. Fear of being misunderstood
Many people feel their inner world is complex, nuanced, or hard to put into words. There’s a fear that therapy will flatten or misinterpret their experience.
Therapy is not about perfect articulation. It’s about exploration. Being misunderstood can be talked about too. In fact, it’s often part of the healing.
7. Fear of change
Even positive change can be unsettling. Therapy may shift how you see yourself, your relationships, or your boundaries. Letting go of familiar patterns, even painful ones, can feel like a loss.
The known can feel safer than the unknown, until the unknown begins to feel more truthful.
A final thought
Being scared to go to therapy doesn’t mean you’re not ready. It often means something in you knows this matters.
Therapy doesn’t start with disclosure or breakthroughs. It starts with a conversation. You don’t have to arrive brave, articulate, or certain. You just have to arrive.
And even that can happen slowly.
If you’re scared, you’re not failing. You’re human.
If you’re curious about starting
I work with clients both online and in person in Crossmaglen, Co. Armagh.
If you’re unsure whether therapy with me would be the right fit, you’re very welcome to book a free, no obligation 15 minute consultation call. This is an informal conversation where we can get a sense of each other, and where you can ask any questions you have. There’s no pressure and no expectation to commit.
Sometimes the first step is simply a conversation.
