As an adult you may experience some of the following;

1. Difficulty with self expression / speaking your needs: When your voice and needs were consistently ignored or dismissed during childhood, you might struggle to express yourself effectively as an adult. You may feel like your opinions don’t matter or that you’re not worthy of being heard,
2. Low self esteem and lack of self worth: Being unseen and unheard can lead to feelings of inadequacy, low self confidence, and a deep-seated sense of not being enough. You might struggle with self doubt, feeling like you’re not good enough or that you’re invisible to the people around you,
3. People pleasing and lack of boundary issues: As a child, you may have learned to suppress your own needs and desires to avoid conflict or gain approval. As an adult, this can manifest as over active people pleasing, overcommitting and a difficulty in setting healthy boundaries,
4. Anxiety, depression, feelings of emotional disconnection: The cumulative effect of being unseen and unheard can contribute to anxiety, depression, or feelings of disconnection from others. You might feel like you’re living in the shadows, unseen and unheard, even as an adult,
5. Difficulty with intimacy and relationships: When your emotional needs were neglected or dismissed during childhood, it can be challenging to form and maintain healthy, intimate relationships as an adult. You might struggle with trust, vulnerability, or feeling seen and heard by your partner/s,
6. Hypervigilance or over self reliance: As a coping mechanism, you may have developed hypervigilance (constantly being on the lookout for potential threats) or excessive self reliance, which can make it difficult to ask for help (“I don’t need anyone, I can do it myself”). While these strategies may have helped you survive as a child, they can become work against you in adulthood, making you feel even more isolated,
7. Inner critic and self blame: The lack of validation and support during childhood can cause you to become a very harsh inner critic, causing you to self blame, ruminate on perceived shortcomings, and replay negative self talk.

It is essential to keep reminding yourself that;

• You are not alone: Many people have experienced similar situations, and it’s not a reflection of your worth or value as a person.
• It’s not your fault: Being unseen and unheard as a child is not a result of anything you did or didn’t do; it’s a circumstance that was outside of your control.
• You can heal and you can grow: By acknowledging and understanding the impact of your childhood experiences, you can begin to work through them, sometimes in the following ways;
  1. Seeking emotional connection based therapy or counselling: Am emotional health therapist can help you process your experiences, develop coping strategies, and work towards healing,
  2. Self reflection and journaling: Writing down your thoughts, feelings, and experiences can help you gain insight into your patterns and behaviors, allowing you to start understanding that your inner feelings were caused by others and are not of your making,
  3. Building a support network: Surround yourself with people who see, hear, and validate you. This can help you develop a sense of belonging and self-worth.
  4. Practicing self-compassion and self-care: Treat yourself with kindness, engage in activities that bring you joy, and prioritize your physical and emotional wellbeing.